Day 1.

Where do I start… Today was pretty rough and I don’t want to get into any details because I am still trying to make sense of today and handle it myself before I tell anyone else what’s going on. I don’t know what to do. I hate being here. I want to go home, I don’t want to be sick, and there are one people in my life that would try to be a little more compassionate about what I am going through. Even tho there are so many people behind me I still feel so alone. I am going through one of the hardest times in my life so far, and even though everyone says to stay positive and keep my head up, it’s really hard to. I feel so isolated. I am also so angry right now. I’m mad at my body, I am mad at myself, I am mad that certain people in my life aren’t doing what they should be doing, I am mad I am so far from home, I am mad that I am going to be going through this alone… Basically I am mad at a lot of things. Everything about this situation sucks. All I’ve wanted to do today was cry, and sometimes I did just that. I just don’t know what to do or how to handle this. One thing I have learned is that  in situations like this you really get to see people for who they really are, and not who you made them out to be in your head, and trust me that is a really shitty feeling. I don’t know what I’m going to do anymore. Some people need to grow up and start acting like an adult.  They make a tough situation worse, and cause more stress on an already stressful situation. I know life doesn’t always go the way you want it to, but what do you do when it never goes your way?

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